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Journey's End - A Rewrite

Title: Journey's End - A Rewrite
Characters: Doctor/Donna
Author: Serdd
Rating: G
Word Count: 1910
Spoilers: Journey's End
Summary: There had to be another way, there is always more than one option when it comes to saving a life. The answer this time, is just a little more complex. How do you save Donna Noble? Don't try.
A/N: I am extremely new to Doctor Who, and haven't even seen this episode. I have merely based it off of what I was able to glean from other fan works, and shape it into what I wish would have happened. If anyone reading this would like to take it one and continue it I would love to see what others may come up with.

“NO!” Donna screamed, pushing him away as hard as she could, and stumbling to the opposite side of the TARDIS.

“Donna-“ The Doctor pleaded, his arms out stretched as he took a slow careful step towards her.

The pain that was now starting to rip through Donna’s head and the rest of her body, was crippling. It took all of her flagging strength to stay standing and even then, she was using the center console to hold herself up.

“No.” She said in a firm yet quivering voice. “I won’t let you Doctor. I won’t let you take my life from me.”

“Donna, stop it.” The Doctor said, taking another step, to witch Donna countered.

She knew that he could have easily dashed forward, jumped the edge of the console, and pined her down in order to take her memories by force. But she also knew that, for her “own good” or not, he would never force her to do anything she truly didn’t want. And whether it meant the end of the world or not; she truly, with everything she had, did not want this.

       “Donna, please,” he begged, trying to stare her down, agonized at the pain he could now see was physically distorting her body. “Donna, please, I can see how much pain you’re in. Please, please let me help you!”

Donna mustered up the strength to glare at him, and shuffle just a little further away from his slowly approaching steps. “Stay away from me, or so help me I will find a faster, messier way to kill myself.”

The Doctor stopped his creeping approach immediately and stared back at her in horror. “Donna! What-no-you don’t-“

       “You’re damn right I mean it! So you just stay right the bloody hell where you are!” She hissed, clutching her chest in agony, as waves of pain rocked her system. She could feel the power of the Time Lord working it’s magic on her body, and as another wave washed over her, she imagined the final result; no more cold, no more loneliness, no boring normal life...‘that’s right Donna, just focus on the end result. Sure it hurts like a bugger now, but think about later, when all that pain has washed away...think of the freedom. That’s a good girl. Concentrate on that...’ Donna coached herself in her racing, overcrowded, mind.

Another wave of pain shot through her sending her to her knees. She was vaguely aware of the sound of the Doctors converts rushing across the grates to her side. However, it wasn’t until the pain had receded slightly and she was able to feel his arms around her, cradling her to his chest; that she fully came back to herself.

With an animalistic cry of fear and anger, Donna somehow found the strength grapple out of his arms, and roll a few feet until her side hit the bottom of the center console, where she pulled herself into a fetal position, and glared at him distrustfully.

The look he gave her, so full of pain, sadness, and fear, caused her to look away from his eyes, and instead focus on his hands, that looked to be shaking as bad as her own.

       “Stay away from me Doctor. I mean it.” Donna rasped, whimpering as another burning wave washed through her system. She could feel it so clearly now, like liquid ice flowing through her veins and over her muscles, shocking every cell in her body. It was an ice so cold it left molten burns in its wake.

       “I know what’s happening to me.” Donna rasped as the pain seemed to recede when she used her mind, only to crash into her stronger than before.

She knew, that as soon as she finished explaining her side to the Doctor, the pain would render her unconscious. She knew that she only had one shot at this. She had to make him see. Make him understand.

       “I know that this could kill me. I know. I know.” Donna took a deep shuddering breath, seeming to fortify her strength. “But I also know that you have a universe to save. And that you aren’t thinking clearly.” She ignored his look of confusion.
       “I don’t hold it against you; you’ve been confused and absentminded a lot lately. And I understand that too. I know that there are a lot more important things that you need to focus on right now, rather than me. But you needed to focus on them, I didn’t. While you were working out your priorities, and the best way to help me, I was solely focused on me; different options, next steps...odds.” When she whispered the last word, she looked up, and saw his eyes glow with dawning realisation, fear, and just a hint of hope.
       “I know that you want to erase my memories, and I also know that you know what I’m talking about. And before you ask, yes, I know the risk involved, and yes, I know that there’s only a 25-30% chance that this will work. But if my choice is to live in misery, or die happy, well, which would you chose?” She said, staring at him defiantly.

“But Donna you don’t-”

       “I don’t what? I don’t know what it would be like to go back without my memories? I don’t know that I’ll be miserable?” She glared at him fiercely, her anger skyrocketing.
       “Damn you! I have your mind, remember?! I have your memories and your knowledge! Even if you had erased my memory, you can’t erase feeling! You know damn well that I would have been left living an empty normal life! Every time I looked up at the stars, empty! Every time there was something strange on the telly and I knew in my gut that I could help, should help, but was powerless to do anything, empty! Every time some bloke took my hand or tried to kiss me, empty! You know this! You know that my subconscious would haunt me, and yet you still want to go through with it!?” Suddenly, the anger that she had been using to fuel her rant left her deflated and shaking.

Her eyes fell to the floor as the question ‘why?’ saw tears streaming down her cheeks.

       “Why?” Donna whispered, looking up at him, her eyes shining with a look of such betrayal that the Doctor felt his own tears rise and fall to match. “Why would you do that to me?” She whimpered brokenly. “I-I mean, I-I know that I can be a-a bit trying at times, and I don’t always catch on the quickest, and sometimes I slow you down. But...I never thought you would do something like this...not you. You saved me; from Lance...from normalcy...from myself...and all the times in between. Those memories; they may not mean anything to you...but they’re everything to me. Those memories give my life meaning, they keep me standing and pushing me forward when both myself and others say I can’t. Why Doctor? Why, after all this time, after you’ve been the only one to believe in me through everything; why, when I need you the most, why are to trying to throw me away?” As soon as she stopped talking, a fierce wave of pain shot through her, causing her to cry out. It was the power of the Time Lord as well as the pain from her breaking heart that riped a harsh scream from her throat.

Ignoring her earlier commands, the Doctor leapt across the few feet separating them, and wrapped his arms around her quaking body.

She whimpered, and tried to struggle free.

       “Shh, shh, Donna, it’s ok. I swear to you, I swear; I’m not going to touch your memories.” He breathed a sigh of relief when she stopped trying to get away from him and instead tried to burro into his chest, whimpering as another wave of pain came over her.
       “Donna, you got to say your piece, and I listened. Will you now do the same for me?” He asked, and smiled tightly when he felt her nod against his chest. “Good girl.” He whispered, placing a kiss on her head, and stroking her hair soothingly.
       “Donna...those memories; your memories, are every bit as important to me as they are to you. Please, never doubt that.” Taking a breath, he sighed heavily, as his other arm squeezed her tightly too him, to which she wrapped her arms around his middle, and burrowed deeper.
       “That, I’m ashamed to say; is the only thing you were wrong about. You’re right, I was thinking about the rest of the universe, rather than focusing solely on you. And you’re right, erasing your memories was the safest, fastest, and least painful way I could come up with to help you. I knew the odds of the other choice, as well as the dangers and the possible consequences. I wanted it Donna, gods, you wouldn’t believe how much I wanted to give you this option and have you chose me. But I knew the odds, like you said. And I knew the pain you would have to suffer. And I know that there are two equally possible outcomes. You either live or die in this sinario Donna. And I couldn’t...I couldn’t be the reason you chose death. Living without you, but knowing you were somewhere in the universe, it would have been hard...but I could have done it, if it meant that you might be happy. But Donna, to not have you in this world, to not be able to see you...I couldn’t-I can’t-I-I-”

       “Silly spaceman.” Donna hummed, tightening her arms around him. “Do you really think that even the power of a Time Lord could stop me when I have both a choice and everything in the cosmos to live for?” She said, her voice getting weaker, and her hold on him loosening.

He could feel her changing, twitching body demanding sleep, and so hurriedly asked: “What Donna, what do you have to live for?”

“You.” She breathed, as her body finally succumbed to the pain, and she passed out.

Trembling, and with fresh tears streaming down his face, the Doctor carefully lifted Donna from the floor, and headed towards her bedroom and placed her on her bed.

In his heart, he knew that she would wake up. She was too damn stubborn for there to be any other outcome.

In his head, he prayed that he was right. The transformation that she was about to take was monumental. He wasn’t sure that the human body and mind could take it. But he also knew, that if there was one person that could survive, and even flourish after that amount of pain; it was Donna Noble.

Running his hands roughly over his face, the Doctor walked over to the plush chair in the corner and fell into it with a huff. ‘For the next few hours,’ the Doctor decided, ‘the universe can wait.’

He knew that her transformation could take more than a few hours, and he knew that the universe, and his responsibility to it, couldn’t wait for long.

But none of that mattered right now. The only thing that mattered was Donna, and the rhythm of her heart beats...

If anyone had told the Doctor at the beginning, how Donna Nobel’s story would end he would never have believed it.

A crashing, painful end.

Followed by a new and blinding beginning.

Who would have thought it...Donna Noble...A Time Lady.


( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
Aug. 31st, 2010 10:00 am (UTC)
Blimey! That "Why?" paragraph really got to me! *wipes tears*
Can I have some more, please?
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )